Do You Allow People to Get Mad at You?

Let’s talk about something we don’t like to admit—anger.

We all get mad. We all mess up. And we all, at some point, have upset someone we care about. That’s part of being human. But here’s where things get complicated: some people act like you’re not allowed to be upset with them.

In my past life I came from a community full of folks who operated under this strange, unspoken rule—they could treat you however they wanted, and you better not have a reaction. You weren't allowed to cry, get upset, or even mention the pain. And if you did? You were the problem.

Take one previous member, for example. They wasn’t really around, but they could recall my mistakes like they were their favorite song on repeat. But when I brought up something they did? Suddenly, they had selective amnesia. 

“I don’t remember that,” he’d say, genuinely offended that I even dared to remember. How convenient.

But that’s not healthy. That’s not love.

A healthy person knows that anger is inevitable. When you do something wrong let people be angry with you.

It’s natural. People are going to disappoint you and be disappointed in you. And you are going to disappoint people. But being upset isn’t the issue—how you process that anger is what matters. Emotionally mature people give each other space to feel, heal, to cool down, to be human. They understand that sometimes walking away isn’t disrespect—it’s regulation. It’s wisdom.

So here’s the question:

Do you allow people to get mad at you?

Or do you expect grace while refusing to extend it?

If you want real relationships—ones that grow, heal, and last—you’re going to have to make room for anger. 

You’re going to have to stop punishing people for having real emotions, especially when you made a mistake. 

You’re going to have to stop acting like you’re always the exception.

Because love without honesty is bondage. And peace that requires silence in the midst of hurt is just control wearing a pretty or handsome face.

Let people feel. Let people express.

And remember—being upset doesn’t mean they don’t love you.
It means they’re still trying.

Disclaimer:
These blog posts are created for entertainment and educational purposes only. While some entries may be written in the first person, they are works of creativity and do not reflect the personal experiences or histories of any specific individual. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental. The content is not intended to represent factual accounts, but rather to inspire thought, spark conversation, and explore ideas through storytelling and commentary.